What do you do when a storm warning causes everyone to run? Not everyone. There are the ones that resolve to board up the windows, hunker down and ride out the storm…no matter what. Then there are the runners. The ones that would rather not deal with the rain; the ones that would rather not take the time to board up the windows or hold your hand during the heaviest of rains or the strongest of winds. What do you do when the one you thought was the strongest decides to be a runner?
I told you, warned you that I felt a storm coming. My meteorological skills are not honed enough to know whether the storm would be a hurricane or a late summer shower. I wish I could see the future so I could warn of the storm but follow with the good news of a quick passing. I wish.
All the times I stayed for your storms. The rain showers you tried to upgrade to storms, and I did not correct you. I let you have your upgrades. I held your hand through the mistings you saw as downpours. I made sure your house was safe and sound. I made sure that if you needed it, I double boarded the windows even when I knew the storm did not call for it. I never downgraded your storms, I was never a runner.
Did you know that it has been six days since the storm returned? Six days since I warned you and voiced my helplessness. Six days since I told you that it was coming and I didn’t know how to stop it, but I wanted to. Six days since you made sure to remind me to eat because, “It’s stupid when you go days without eating, I don’t care what the reason is,” and then left. Six days of radio silence. Six. Whole. Days.
It is because of runners like you, we with stormy days (or weeks) pretend that it is a sunny day. Runners like you cause us to feel like we should be ashamed of our cloudy days. We appreciate the ones that board the house up and make sure that we are okay, even from afar.
But the feelings of gratitude are so often overshadowed by the heartbreak of knowing the ones we want the most are runners.